Tuesday 25 June 2013

My meeting with oncology 25th June 2013

So it's happening. I had my first appointment with my wig man... Then the oncologist. 

Yes I have put these two together, both equally important in my book! 

My wig appointment went very well. The down side was that it was the colour of Barbie (it doesn't suit me, I'm no Barbie) and I still have hair so it kept sliding but the idea was great. Lovely real hair, good length and I liked how it sat. Lovely Stephen from Leo Bancroft will now order me a couple in. He will cut, colour and style the wig for me so it should look like my hair. For the price I'm paying it should look better than my actual hair!! 

I am still going to crop my hair.  I will send you a picture of my new short hair. This will be happening asap. 

But I am going to try the cold cap. It will make my hair thin, weak, brittle and basically crap but it will contain at least an inch of hair. This is a start! If it all goes tits up I'll grab the razor and my brother in law can shave it off, no biggy. The lot will grow back. 

The next part of my day was an hour and a half wait for my oncology appointment. That was just great. I'm nervous as it is and then they make me wait! 

Finally I meet my doctor. Dr Laing, nice guy, no George Clooney but still lovely. He wants me to have bloods taken, an ECG to make sure my heart is ok (and that I have one ;-)) and scarily a CT scan to make sure 'Clive' hasn't spread! Then after all that chemo will start next week. 

I am ready. I know what drugs I'm gonna be given, I won't bore you all, even I don't understand! I have the head scarves, wigs and earrings at the ready. All is left is to start and deal with it. 

My eggs will not be frozen. There is no time. I will leave children up to fate. Right now I need to live and then I will think about my future family. 

I am scared, petrified in fact but like I've said before, my strength is so powerful even I need to question it! 

Things always happen for a reason, not sure why this is all happening right now but still, I will deal with it as it comes. 

Doctor said to me, 'do you want to hear about side effects?' 

No I don't, I will deal with them
as they happen. That's just the way I am. 

After tomorrow I should have a date for chemo.  

Is it odd that I'm looking forward to it? I need to get rid of Clive. He's just hanging around, he's really annoying me, just sat there distressing me and making me anxious. (Seriously its like a frickin boyfriend you don't want. Just my luck!) 

Anyway he'll go soon enough, I've just gotta keep smiling through the pain. Somehow it makes it easier :-) 

Xx 


8 comments:

  1. Hi Alex, sending some love your way... Your positivity & humour will see you through this - you are leagues above "Clive" & the sooner he's outta your life the better!
    The wig sounds like it'll be great with all the attention it's going to get!
    Wishing you well on your journey - keep strong & smiling
    XXX
    Michelle

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  2. Thank you so much for your comment. It means a lot that people are reading this and are behind me. It keeps me strong and really positive.
    xxx

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  3. Hi gorgeous Alex - fabulous to see you on you visit to Spain and sending you heaps of positivity for all you are about to face. Looking forward to seeing you back here soon and remember that ´Clive´ is not invited.
    Keep fighting, stay strong and positive.
    Debbie & Peter
    xxxx

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  4. Hi Alexa,

    I often wondered why I never liked the name Clive now I know:-

    A word that can be used to replace anything you fancy... Can be fitted into any context, and is perfect to add that extra bit of pizazz into a sentence. 'Clive' is famously hard to be defined - anyone asking "What does clive mean?" is frowned upon until they can work out that it does not actually have a meaning..

    Alexa on the other hand does have a purpose a strong meaning

    Powerful and complete You are very intuitive. You have a reservoir of inspired wisdom combined with inherited analytical ability, which could reward you through expressions of spiritual leadership, business analysis, marketing, artistic visions, and scientific research. Operating on spiritual side of your individuality can bring you to the great heights, and drop you off if you neglect your spiritual identity. You are always looking for an opportunity to investigate the unknown, to use and show your mental abilities, to find the purpose and meaning of life. You want to grow wise and to understand people and things. You are probably an introrvert. You need privacy to replenish your energy. You have a unique way of thinking, intuitive, reflective, absorbing.

    Best of luck, I say about time to say bye bye to Clive xx

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  5. Sending you massive hugs and love from Cyprus - I'm sure Clive wont be invited for 2014 :0) Love from Charli (Henny's friend) xxxxxx

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  6. To all of you, your comments and love mean the world to me. All this positive energy will come back to me and help me through.

    Sally your comment is amazing. I loved what you said.x

    Debbie, had a lovely time in Spain, will be coming back next year and no Clive will not be coming :-) xx

    Thank you Charlie, your support is so appreciated x

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  7. Alex, sending lots of positive thoughts and hugs your way.xxx

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    Replies
    1. Hi Jayne, thank you for your positive thoughts and hugs. Every gesture is much appreciated and makes me stronger every day.
      Keep reading and enjoy :-)xxx

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