Friday, 31 May 2013

31st May 2013

Normal is a funny word... I want to be, yet I don't quite know what it is. 

Today I felt it. Normality. I went to work with no tears. No pain, no guilt. Just normal. All my friends just let me talk and they talked and I laugh. I laughed a lot today. I've hurt my back. I'm in so much pain, yet it's a pain that I can handle. It makes me think only of that, and not the pain I feel but can not quite explain! 

I put a pair of tights on my head today, to see what I'd look like with a scarf on! A bit daft to be honest but again we all laughed. I'll look ok, good jaw line apparently. You don't look really at the features on your face until you are forced to face reality and go bald. 

One girl found another girls strand of weave on the floor, "here you go Al, a little bit of hair to help you out." I cracked up. The colouring was all wrong. 

I have had so many beautiful messages from friends, family, even my dentist sent me flowers! He's probably hoping that the fake tooth he put in a couple of months ago won't fall out!! That's not a good look and I won't be happy. Bald with a tooth missing is not acceptable! 

Yes, today was a good day. Tomorrow... Who knows. I will have to say good bye to work for a while. The next time they all see me I'll have a wig on! Hopefully I'll have eyebrows, tattoo of course. 

Tomorrow in my head will also be a good day. Just as long as my soppy work colleagues don't start crying! I know they will, maybe I'll cry with them. We'll see. 


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